Oh! I still remember the blow the scale dealt
As my feet finally feared less enough to step on
And my eyes lost the fight, staring down
At the figures flashing, then fixed against the screen.
95kg?!! How…when…wait this isn’t working.
This isn’t happening! How could this happen?
“Wait”, I said as off unbelieving I reset the lie
But felt the shock as I to myself no more could lie.
The funny looks of mean bastards jeering,
The rejection felt in taxi seats, public places
The TV’s bashing of me, through photoshopped “perfection”
And the promise that this was all going to get worse!
So here I am in a world new to me, unknown to me,
Wishing to step out of the discomfort I face.
I still love me, for all God gave mummy to give me
But the sphygmomano also dealt a worse blow:
As my heart flirted with pressure beyond what vessels could hold.
I had to make a plan.